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May 21, 2007 | by  | in News | [ssba]

Graduation ’07

Students receive certificates, wear funny hats

Around 1850 students last week graduated, receiving degrees, diplomas and certificates marking their qualifications and time spent studying and drinking at Vic.

Sixteen graduates were presented with doctorates, with research topics as wide ranging as children’s interactions in the playground and classroom, violent offending in women, and the biology of virus uptake and elimination in Pacific oysters.

The traditional street parades took place on Wednesday and Thursday of last week. There were lots of balloons, although inexplicably there were a lot more graduates than balloons.

One commentator theorised some of them were just too dumb to hold onto their balloons until it was time to release them in one big “balloon letting go” session. And some were too dumb to let go once the time came. This probably doesn’t reflect too well on our well-educated members of society.

Kerry Prendergast took the opportunity to ramble on about how wonderful Wellington is and how everyone should come here to live and they should probably bring their families and how they definitely shouldn’t leave the city upon graduation.

The hordes of nearly 2000 are now faced with a tough decision: whether to commit to the drudgery of working in the ‘real world’, or to confess they still don’t know what they want to do and continue with post-grad.


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  1. Franky Boy says:

    A very poorly written article

  2. Matt says:

    I’ll bet your penis grew three whole centimetres after posting that.

  3. Franky Boy says:

    Is the Pope a Catholic? Does a bear shit in the woods?

  4. Jackson says:

    The Pope is secretly an alien sent down to befuddle the simple minds of human kind with stories of mystical happenings in ancient times.

    Bears however do shit in the woods… cept for when they are staying at the Hilton… then they shit in the ravaged corpse of the bellhop.

  5. Franky Boy says:

    Someone befuddled me once. I had to spend some time on antibiotics as a result.

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