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August 2, 2010 | by  | in News | [ssba]

Salient plots cloning of Brad Pitt, bids on garlic naan


Salient staff members have decided to bid on Brad Pitt’s half-eaten garlic naan on internet auction site TradeMe.

It is hoped that the DNA extracted from the garlic naan can be used to clone Pitt, to create a small army of Salient volunteers.

This army would be used to produce Salient in the event Sir Roger Douglas’ Education (Freedom of Association) Amendment Bill is passed, and voluntary student membership (VSM) is forced on students’ associations.

The army of Pitts will also be used for reproductive purposes. Any offspring from the clones will be sold back to the Jolie-Pitt family for a
large profit.

Salient hopes that such measures will ensure the longevity of the magazine in the event Douglas succeeds.

Salient would like to clarify that no student money will be used to purchase said garlic naan.


About the Author ()

Salient is a magazine. Salient is a website. Salient is an institution founded in 1938 to cater to the whim and fancy of students of Victoria University. We are partly funded by VUWSA and partly by gold bullion that was discovered under a pile of old Salients from the 40's. Salient welcomes your participation in debate on all the issues that we present to you, and if you're a student of Victoria University then you're more than welcome to drop in and have tea and scones with the contributors of this little rag in our little hideaway that overlooks Wellington.

Comments (4)

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  1. Oliver says:

    “(VSM) is forced on students’ associations” – I didn’t know you could force freedom on people?

  2. Miller says:

    Have you ever seen The Shawshank Redemption? Good movie.

  3. smackdown says:

    lmao with people equating vsm with FREEDOM

    william wallace fighting king edward’s army so some douchebag could save $160 bux

  4. smackdown says:

    ps i dont care about vsm bring it on

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