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September 19, 2011 | by  | in Opinion | [ssba]

Ask Constance

Hey Constance. I have a very unusual problem but I’m not making any of it up. Sometimes when I am in a very horny mood I like to take my clothes off (as a lot of people do) but then I go outside into my garden. It gets worse. Sometimes I look over the fence to see if anyone is in the street and if I can’t see anyone I sometimes open the gate, tip toe out of it then quickly scurry back into my property. The thing is, I don’t want to be seen, but I get off on the thought of being seen. I’m so worried that I will be caught and friends and family will find out. Help me CC.

Oh you sweet thing, what a fun wee fetish you have. It’s not a problem, it’s something fun that gets you off. Don’t stress, enjoy your own quirks! Unless you are being a public menace i.e. forcing your naked self on others when they’re not keen for Nakey-boy, then what you’re doing is harmless, a bit exciting and totally sexy.
Unless you are doing it to friends and family, or you happen to live with them and do it while they’re home, I wouldn’t worry about them finding out. Be careful with the street-venturing, because in a residential property no one is going to call the cops, and worst case scenario is your neighbour gets a fright and who the fuck cares because you can be naked in your own damn garden. However, on the street it could be ‘public exposure’ which may get you in trouble but a highly doubt it if you’re not being an aforementioned naked menace.

Just generally go with it, if it turns you on and you’re not hurting anyone then good for you, Nakey-boy. Also consider some sneaky public place sex next time you have a sex friend. It sounds like it could be up your alley. x

Dear Constance, I have a perpetual problem with combining love and sex. This has always lead to such morally decrepit behaviour like cheating; I am in a relationship with a beautiful man who I absolutely love, and who loves me but I have an almost overwhelming desire to sleep with other people. I know that an open relationship is out of the question but I’m terrified of potentially ending the relationship. Should I cut my losses and go solo? Or will this desire eventually fade? Frustrated.

To quote myself (like a boss) on a similar question earlier in the year—have a think about what your priorities are, what the pros and cons of all options are, and I think you’ll find there’s a clear preference somewhere in there. But be prepared for it to not be as clean cut as you’d like, because even in preferences there’s compromise: if you stay monogamous you’re going to have to compromise on your desire to explore, and if you leave him you’re going to have to compromise on having the man you love. What compromise can you live with the most? X


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