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September 25, 2006 | by  | in Music | [ssba]

Cobra Khan, Sleepless Lions

The members of Cobra Khan are old enough to know better. As evidenced by their 80s referencing band name. Apparently they’re an Auckland Punk Supergroup. This means their members have all been in other bands that failed to go anywhere, but bar owners know them well

enough to let them open for touring international talent.

Perhaps I can’t fault a band for sticking to their roots, no matter how adolescen and American they are. Because this is teenage SoCal skate punk to the MAXX (scull that Mountain Dew, brah!). You can tell these guys, and female keyboard player, must have grown up with every identical Pennywise album on eternal repeat. It’s probably all been done before, I wouldn’t entirely know. I had all my ‘punk’ albums stolen at a party in sixth form and dedicated myself to unlistenable metal instead (no one wanted to steal my Suffocation CDs). I can’t understand how anyone could possibly still be stuck in this kind of phase, post-High School. Surely you slide into hardcore or discover the roots of punk and toss aside radio friendly immature three-chord sevenzerox removed copies of the Damned? Green Day have a lot to fucking answer for. I could almost forgive this Saved By The Bell punk-rock if they viagra price sung about anything remotely interesting, political, stirring or hell, humourous. But this is dour, dare I say it, emo crap. Check this out: “so bring me something that I wanna hate/why fight the feeling for dancing on razorblades/the city lights are breeding the pain”. Those aren’t even the worst lyrics. Slipknot has more self-awareness, and better choruses. I cannot honestly tell if this is supposed to be Turbonegro dumb or just plain fucking stupid. There is an audience for this… and that’s the saddest thing of all.


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  1. Betty says:

    What a dick, you obviously dont know your nose from your arsehole. Hardcore music runs a little bit deeper than penny wise!

  2. Nick says:

    I think the implication is that while hardcore may run deeper than Pennywise, Cobra Kahn, sadly, do not.

  3. vengenceforthiswebsite says:

    fuk wat can i say, do a google search for one of my good friends band who are fuking brilliant and going to go a long way and come up with this crap. get a real fuking job bro cos u obviously no good at this one, as a music reviewer (of sorts) u are supposed to be open to all types of music and go into it with an open mind and encourage NZ musicians to further themselves and career. hope u are enjoying spending truck loads of money on ur degree u fuk head and me and most of my punk rock friends will be laughing at u pumping gas when u fail! ATTENTION EDITOR ur music reviewer is a closet brittney spears fan obviously. what more can i say? oh yea, get fuked

  4. Holden Iscariot says:

    Shut up. Why encourage shit bands to get even shitter? And, for the record, that’s the first time I’ve ever heard a ‘punk rocker’ thinking that someone with a degree is going to have a worse life than them. Pathetic.

  5. Laura says:

    “me and most of my punk rock friends will be laughing at u pumping gas when u fail!”
    Yea, mate, the rest of your punk rock friends will probably get real jobs. Don’t rate yourself, it’s painful.

  6. Chris says:

    I should have wrote more reviews drunk.
    Ah well.
    Hindsight and all that.

  7. Ivy says:

    I think that anyone who thinks that bands like Sommerset and Day One didn’t go anywhere obviously doesn’t have enough of a background in New Zealand punk rock or hardcore to make a worthwhile declaration about it.

  8. Ollie says:

    What a dick. Have u even listened to “Sleepless Lions”. And what do you mean by all the other bands were failures… Have you even herd of Day One… Failures my ass. “I can’t understand how anyone could possibly still be stuck in this kind of phase, post-High School” Try telling that to Henry Rollins (Black Fag), the Dead Kennedys ect. I dont know if you have noticed but at the momment one of New Zealands biggest bands is a hardcore-Punk band… BLEEDERS you tard. THink you might want to reconsider your review dick.

  9. Tim says:

    Thats one less option for Uni, guess I will be going to Christchruch Uni then because if this is the kind of biast crap Wellington has to serve up then Im out… Douche. Seriously if your doing anything to do with Journalism or anything to do with Reviewing Music etc. Then give up now, because this shit is unacceptable. Oh and for next time review the songs not the band and dont just review the lyrics review important stuff like the structure of the song and all that shit (I guess)

    PS: Your a dick!

  10. Conor says:

    For someone who so willingly accuses a band of lacking substance, your review is hipocritically superficial. It sounds like you watched a music videdo of the band and didn’t like their haircuts. “Emo crap” is little more than a fashion judgement, it would be nice to find something about the music in question, being that this is a music review…in fact almost the only musical references are to the pop-culture American icons that you incorrectly pidgeon hole them with. Forgive me for asking, but it begs the question, is this a rant against fringes or a music article?

    It’s easy to sound eloquent when you’re ripping the shit out of something, we get that. But gratuitous, exagerrated negativity has no place in “journalism”, student or no.

  11. Chris Walker says:

    Tim & Conor: You guys are douche bags. Go fuck yourselves. I write for Rolling Stone now so go shove a bunch of pool balls up your anus and then lick the shit off them all you slap happy cunts.

  12. Conor says:

    Congratulations. It’s obviously brought you much happiness and peace of mind…I never said anything about your job, your future or your many virtues as a person, I said this review is a piece of shit. It looks like you’re a good writer, who in this case got so absorbed in the sound of his own words you decided to spend more time trying to weave together your pejorative yet oh so clever analogies than actually, you know, review music…being any part of the media carries with it certain responsibilities, and when journalists stop writing to inform, and start writing to impress, it undermines the whole industry.

  13. hayden says:

    cobra khan rocks and it seems mtv has seen there musical talent also as they are now being promoted on there adds.
    you may be a big shot writing for rolling stone mag bt your still a fuck face and your new job cnt cover that up.

    suk my kok

  14. Craig says:

    LOL crap band. I would rather listen to cats screwing in the bath.

  15. Jackson Wood says:

    Cats screwing in the bath? Wow.

  16. I’d rather [verb] to [noun] [verb] in a [noun]

  17. Reuben says:

    Oh give them a fucking break! This is some FRESH Kiwi music and you’re shutting it down?! The fuck is your problem? I will support these guys until they subside into obscurity!

    Shit, you can at least mention the fact that C4 is playing some Kiwi music that isn’t RAP for once.

  18. Dave says:

    I thought Sleepless Lions was the best Rock EP released in NZ in 06′. Cobra Khan’s debut album Helogrithms is bloody outstanding!

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