– Unnecessary Apathy
– Illogical Hope
– Smug Post-modernism
– Regressive Post-feminism
– At least two internets worth of porn
Top Five Back Handed Compliments
– ‘You smell like my dog.’
– ‘That was kinda funny.’
– ‘You’re pretty smart – for a guy.’
– ‘It’s good that you acknowledge your flaws.’
– ‘I could spend the rest of my life with you. Could.’
Top Five High Concept Movie Pitches
– Tarantino meets ‘The Joy Luck Club’
– ‘Hostel’ meets ‘The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants’
– David Lynch meets Judd Apatow
– ‘Rocky II’ meets ‘Rocky IV’
– ‘Young People Fucking’
Top Five Contrived Plot Twists
– The Butler Did It
– He was dead all along.
– He’s a she.
– It was the whales!
– They all lived happily ever after.
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