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March 8, 2015 | by  | in The Moan Zone | [ssba]

How Much Does a Polar Bear Weigh?

Enough to break the ice! We begin our third issue the same way you freshers will begin your first tutorials this week—with a cringe-worthy icebreaker. Icebreakers are designed to remove the awkward barrier of engaging with strangers, but just as the prefix “no offence” only prepares the receiver (LOL) to take offence—icebreakers only make things more awkward. We thought we’d prepare you on how to how to cope with the most awful icebreakers we could find on Silk Road.

The Human Knot: First things first, get next to the hottest person in the room, because you are about to hold their sweaty hand for the next however long until you give up, and if you are from an all boys’ school, waistband it early. While the intention of this game is to create a bond through problem solving and physical contact, perhaps the same can be achieved without having your face in someone’s armpit.

Two Truths, One Lie: The reality is the person guessing has forgotten your last two statements by the time you tell them your third one. So they will probably say “that one” and forget anything they might have learnt about you.

The Birthday Line Up: Although you didn’t give two shits about this game when you were in primary school, the tutor still wants you to shuffle around the room getting in a ridiculous line for no reason with zero chance of getting it right. On the odd chance you did it successfully, I’m sure you are all best friends now.

Our advice is to be interesting and try to get a laugh. You are all in the same position and getting comfortable around new people is always a challenge. Just be thankful that your tutor hasn’t forced the dreaded Toilet Paper icebreaker on you: a game which involves publicly declaring how much paper you require when visiting the facilities and then subsequently stating an “interesting” fact about yourself for every sheet. No one want to know the ins-and-outs of your ins-and-outs, also you are at uni to “find yourself”, so the facts you just told the class weren’t just inane and boring, but also fictional.

Tip of the week: to avoid icebreakers all together, don’t go to your tutorials—worked for Tom.

See you for tut6 in MY103… or is it MY104…

Tom and Luke

P.S. Feel free to give us constructive criticism/general abuse on our FB page—


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