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July 16, 2018 | by  | in SWAT | [ssba]


University! A place where we make lifelong friends, where we have the happiest time of our lives!
Or — university: a place where we have a whole lot of acquaintances in lectures that we may awkwardly nod to when walking through the Hub. A place were we have to weigh up the risk vs reward of saying hi to someone we know, in case they have tragically forgotten your entire existence. Often, a friend made in a lecture will remain a friend from a lecture. It’s not like in high school, where friends were just… friends. Instead, it’s “Kelly from History!”, or “Morgan from English!” It’s wonderful people who you only share time with in the context of a lecture/tutorial.
It doesn’t have to be like this. There’s an ancient and arcane way of moving past this state of friendship purgatory; it’s an art that I’ve honed from my days at both Auckland and Victoria Universities. The trick is simple — moving your friendship beyond the lecture hall or tutorial room. There is plenty of opportunities for this around campus. A simple “Hey, do you want to get a hot chocolate after this?” can work wonders. Eventually, you may want to take your friendship to a context OUTSIDE of university, and this is always a good sign that you’ve broken past that sinister acquaintance barrier.
It’s important to realise that you might not click with someone. This is completely fine and healthy. We’re all very different individuals and sometimes our wavelengths just aren’t going to align in the right way. Don’t be afraid to recognise this and seek out friendships that will truly enrich your university experience. They say that 15% of people meet their future spouses at university, but an even greater percentage will meet lifelong best friends. So get amongst it!


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